Not me! Monday

I haven't definitely not been a major slacker lately when it comes to blogging! I have so many ideas running through my head at all the hours of the day that I always make sure to get them down on paper before I forget them.

You haven't seen any blogs in awhile, you say? Well.....you must have missed them!

August flew right by! I can't believe it's almost September! At least we have 4 whole months until Christmas. That's plenty of time to get Christmas shopping done, right? I most certainly have not started mine. While we're on the subject, I also haven't had a running Christmas list for everyone since June. That is far too early to even be thinking about Christmas, much less buying.

When I do shop, I get things done. I'm so not one of those shoppers who loads down their shopping cart and then has second thoughts and empties it of every.single.thing. That's not me!

At church yesterday, I did not wince when the praise and worship coordinator thanked our praise band for all the time we spent working on the music for this week, seeing as how we didn't practice until 9 am on Sunday morning. I always make sure I am prepared for things way ahead of time, even on weeks when I have substituted, taught piano lessons, helped my sister move into her new apartment, played with Kade, etc., etc. I am super everything. (Please note my sarcasm)

Speaking of Kade, he is such a wonderful, lively, fun one year old. He's not at the age where he can wander around the yard and he hates the grass, so it's hard to do things with him outside. However, I would never make him sit outside in his birthday wagon for an hour while I pulled weeds in my weed garden, prompting one of our neighbors to say, "Wow! He must be a good boy! He's been sitting there for awhile!"

I am also careful of what goes into his little body. He eats a lot of fruit and all of his other snacks say things like "Organic" or "All natural". I am constantly telling people, "No, he cannot eat that. Why? Because I don't want him to have it; it's not good for him." That being said, I would never, ever share my pizza with him and if I did, he would not enjoy it. My boy only likes healthy food! He knows what's good for him!

I did not do all of the laundry this weekend, knowing that it would leave me nothing to do on Monday. I love to fold laundry during naptime and would much rather be doing that then surfing the interwebz. What a waste of time! I mean, I guess I could clean the bathrooms but we're out of bathroom cleaner and I refuse to leave to house to get some more. Really, though, I cleaned them last week, so what's the use? haha

Happy Monday, everyone!

Who's da boss?

I'll tell you who's not my boss--Society.

You know what really burns me up? When everyone adjusts their moral compass because society says, "It's ok."

Oh, at first, you feel little twinges of guilt for whatever it is you're thinking or doing, but look around at everyone else, surf the web, read enough magazines, watch enough TV, and pretty soon, the "iffy" feelings go away. Wanna know how I know? I've done it! I've done it over and over!

If you're a Christian, we call this the Holy Spirit. We hear this still, small voice (otherwise known as your conscience) and we choose to listen to it or ignore it. Stifle it enough, and it goes completely away. Feels pretty good since you aren't questioning yourself or your actions, but at some point--either here or in eternity--it will come back to bite you.

I don't want to live "up" to society's standards. I don't even want to live up to my own standards. I want to live up to God's standards. He's my boss. And though I have the hardest time being submissive and letting Him be the boss, I am choosing to give Him reign. Have Your way with me. I may struggle over and over every.single.day and never quite succeed, but I am going to make the effort.

Who's your boss?

I know He's for me....and you

Yesterday was the first day of school in Wise County, and the significance was not lost on me.

Kade woke up at 4:00 and refused to go back to sleep, so I was too sleepy to realize was day it was--until 7:30 am when we were both lying on the couch, Kade on my chest. I laid there, watching the slow rise and fall of his back as he breathed, perfectly content and comfortable and safe. Then, it hit me. Instead of rushing around, trying to get both of us ready, probably getting irritated, dropping him off and then crying in my car in front of the school until it was time to go in, I was right where I was meant to be.

I say this, not in a bragging way, because nothing of this was my doing, but as an extremely thankful mom.

For weeks after I went back to work, I sat in my car and cried and then went to my classroom and cried. I did my job, all while yearning to be at home with my sweet boy. After a few days (okay, maybe weeks) of whining around, I started praying.

One of my favorite songs during that time--and still--was Kari Jobe's "You are for me".
It says:

I know that You are for me
I know that You are for me
I know that You will never
Forsake me in my weakness
And I know that You have come down
Even if to write upon my heart
To remind me who You are

I put a sticky note on my computer monitor that said, You are for me, and every morning (and afternoon, and evening, and middle of the night), I prayed, God, I know You're for me. I know You're not against me. I know You want me to have the desires of my heart.

I thought there was no way. I thought things were impossible, but He made a way.
I am so thankful. When I whine about not having a lot of extra spending money (Oh, boo hoo, right?), I look at Kade and remember what God has done. I remember that He is for me.

And not just me, but you.

He is on your side! He's for you! Believe it!

Friends...

I think first birthdays are special to every parent.

I remember my parents talking about how many people were at my first birthday party and how many people loved me.

When we got home from Kade's party Saturday night, Michael looked at Kade and said, "Buddy, you are blessed!"

And he is.

Not because he had a big party and not because he got presents, but because there were so many people there who loved him. They weren't there for the free food or the swimming; every single person was there because they care about and love Kade.


These are the kind of friends who would be there in a split second if I needed them. They would do anything for us, no strings attached. We could go months without seeing them and feel like we had never been apart. We have thousands of memories and a million inside jokes.

Friends are a blessing. Though we have one great Friend, it's nice to have some here on earth.

To all of ours--Thanks for making Kade's first birthday so wonderful!

"Not Me! Monday"

It's Monday again! So hard to believe another week has gone by!

You know, I try to eat relatively healthily. I've lost a lot of weight since Kade was born and I plan on keeping it off! I give in every now and then, but I definitely would never eat hot dogs for three meals in a row. Nope! Not me!

I also would not make these ginormous cookies with brownies inside the day before Kade's birthday, knowing we would be having plenty of cake and cookies around the house.

I don't think I've posted any pictures of things I've canned from my garden, but I have (or had, before we ate some) 19 jars of green beans, 26 jars of pickles, 9 jars of spaghetti sauce, and 4 jars of salsa. Canning things I have grown is such a rewarding feeling. Therefore, I would never let a bag of tomatoes just sit in my fridge because I was sick and tired of boiling, peeling, and chopping them. Nope! That is my very favorite part. And I am definitely not a waster!

On another note, Kade turned one at 12:15 am on Friday morning. We put him to bed around 9 on Thursday night, and I knew I had plenty to do the next day--bake and ice the cakes, take Kade to the doctor, pick up a few things from the store, etc, etc. Knowing this, I would never have stayed up until 12:15, just to post a "Happy Birthday!" status on my Facebook. Because, of course, I definitely could have done it on Friday morning when I woke up.

Speaking of my obsession interest in the internet, I do not get up and nurse Kade in the living room just so I can check NP and Facebook. That would be just embarrassing to admit. It would be much easier to just lie in bed anyway. The web can wait.

I also would never post a picture like this just to make myself laugh on a Monday morning when it is almost 9:30 and I have still not had my coffee.


Happy Monday, everyone!

Good News

He said to them, "Go into all the world and preach the good news to all creation. Mark 16:15

Jesus said the above words to the eleven remaining disciples when he appeared to them after he had risen from the dead.

What is the "good news"?

People seem to have different ideas, especially in today's world.

To some pastors and teachers, the "good news" is that God wants you to prosper; He wants you to surround yourself with Godly, intelligent, successful people and make you a success. He wants you to think positive, be self-confident, and go after your dreams This isn't too far from the truth. Jeremiah 29:11 says, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

The problem is that this often very heavily waters down the Word of God. There is so much more to the message than being prosperous, especially being prosperous on this earth. In fact, this is kind of a selfish message as it focuses on ourselves more than anything.

On the other end of the extreme, some preachers and even individuals, seem to think that the "good news" is that God is coming soon, nonbelievers are going to hell, and everything about this world is of the devil. Once again, this is pretty much true. Mark 16:16 says, "Whoever believes and is baptized will be saved, but whoever does not believe will be condemned."

Though it is true that the Bible says those who don't believe will not spend eternity with Him, that is not the focus of the message. It's not the "good news." Though people should know the consequences of their actions (or inaction as the case may be), condemnation is not God's focus. Fear of eternity is not God's focus. In fact, John 3:16-17 says, "For God so loved the world that he gave His only begotten son........For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.

The good news is that God sent Jesus to save us. He wants us to have life and to have it more abundantly. He wants us to have heaven to look forward to. He wants us to come to Him out of love, not out of fear. He wants to reward us, not punish us. Doesn't that sound like good news to you?

Don't get me wrong. We still have to remember that there are always consequences for our actions. You touch a hot stove, you get burned. That kind of thing.

Ultimately, though, if we accept it, there is love and forgiveness.

Have you shared the good news today?

August 6, 2009

Today is full of so many milestones.
12 months of life for Kade.
12 months of being a mother for me.
12 months of breastfeeding.
12 months of constant change in my opinions and my thoughts.
12 months of a closer relationship with God.
12 months of experiencing unconditional love in the flesh.

The best 12 months of my life.


I wish I could explain all the indescribable ways my heart has been changed in the last 365 days.
I wish I could fully express the joy of being a mother and the intense love that wells up everytime I look into his face.

In the split second that Kade was pulled from me and I stared into his unblinking eyes, I caught a little glimpse of what Mary must've felt when she realized that she was holding Emmanuel--God with us.
At that moment, he was the purest form of innocence.

I never thought I wanted to be a mother, and now--I realize it is my life's calling.

Kade,

You changed my life, like winter to spring,
You changed my mind--about everything.
You changed me from a girl to a woman
Just a wife to a mother
Made my husband a father.
You changed my heart, from full to overflowing.
You changed my plans, without even knowing.
You changed all my motives--I do it all for you.
You changed my dreams, yet they've all still come true.
You changed my whole world the second you came,
And now that you're here, I'll never be the same.

Happy Birthday, baby.

I love you,

Momma

P.S. Don't grow up so fast. Let me hold you a little longer.

One year ago today....

One year ago today, I got up and went to work. I started to set up my brand new classroom. I was exactly 37 weeks pregnant.
I worked in a school with no air conditioning and it was quite possibly in the 90 degree range inside of the school that day. I put up bulletin boards, made copies, got my textbooks, and finalized my maternity leave plans (because I knew Kade would be born sometime in the following weeks). At 2:30, I took one last look around my classroom, locked the door, and went downstairs to attend a faculty meeting. I had my 37 week doctor's appointment at 3:30.
I went to the doctor's appointment. They took my blood pressure. They took it again. They got someone else to take it to make sure that the first two nurses were correct. Then, they sent me to the hospital.
I have never been so scared in my life. I had never, ever, in my life been in the hospital. They said they were just going to monitor my blood pressure for a few hours and make sure I didn't have pre-E, but when they hooked me up to the monitor, they discovered I was having contractions. Big contractions. Fairy close contractions.
They said I would have to stay there all night, at least.
And that was my day, in a nutshell, one year ago.
Nearing much closer than I thought to one of the biggest days of my life.