Wednesday, May 18, 2011


I've been learning a lot about submitting to God this week. As I've probably mentioned before (and wrote a whole draft for a book about this subject), I like to be in control.  I like to know what's going to happen, when.  I don't like surprises--even good ones.  Ask my husband.  I beg for information about my Christmas and birthday presents for weeks beforehand.  I can't stand for someone to know something that I don't.

So, this whole lesson on submission started on Sunday. I went to the altar to pray and someone I have known for practically my whole life came up and laid her hands on my shoulders. When I stood up, she said, "God wants you to lift your hands and accept the blessing He has for you." I said, "Ok," but I pretty much thought, "Pssht, I will lift my hands when I want to." I walked to my seat, and something inside of me said, "Leah! What is wrong with you? God told you to lift your hands and He would give you a blessing. Why would you not?" So, I lifted them.  There are different ways of raising your hands to God.  You can raise them in praise, thanking Him for simply being God or you can raise them in submission, giving Him control over your life. I raised them in submission.

I'll save what happened after that for a later time, but I've dealt with submission the rest of the week so far. I can't control what's going on in my life. I don't want to live in fear. So, I decided to dive into the Word.  I've kept praise music on constantly.  I've read my devotional.  I've read the Bible.  I've prayed.  I've raised my hands.  What else can I do?  I dislike not knowing the future, but through submitting to God, I can at least have some peace.

Many people don't like the word "submission."  Just quickly looking up a definition, it is listed as, "To yield or surrender oneself to the will or authority of another."  I think, as humans, we immediately think, "I am not letting someone else tell me what to do!" When you love someone though, when you trust someone, and know that they have your best interests at heart (which God does), it's easier to say, "Ok, have Your way in my life. You know best." It's not, "Ok, I'll obey you because you're big and scary and you're going to beat me if I don't do what you say." Submitting is obedience and respect out of deep love that goes both ways.  True love.  Not some warped sense of love and commitment.

We can't control everything.  We can't control a lot of things.  We can trust God to take care of them, though.  And that's what I'm doing.  Hands raised high.  I trust You, God.  Do what You will. 

Monday, May 9, 2011

The impact of LIFE

Today is my birthday. I don't feel any older yet.  As always, it will probably take me at least 6 months to remember that I am now 2__ instead of 2__.  It's been a weekend full of celebrating life!

Birthdays are (duh, I know!) a celebration of the day a person was born. They are so much more than that, though. This morning, my sister came over to bring me my birthday present before she went back to college (she got me more k-cups for my coffee maker and some creamer! My favorite!). She said something to Kade about 'it's kind of like your birthday, because it's mommy's birthday.' I gave her one of those crazy looks, like, 'No, it is not!' Later, I started thinking.

If I hadn't have been born today, Kade wouldn't be here. If my husband hadn't have been born, Kade wouldn't be here.  If my parents hadn't chosen to have me, I wouldn't be here.  If my mom hadn't have been born, I wouldn't be here today. If my dad hadn't have been born, I wouldn't be here today. If I hadn't have been born, I wouldn't have the hope of other children, or grandchildren, or great grandchildren.  Really, it's a celebration of everyone--past, present, and future. Call me deep or call me crazy, but that's the way I see it.

So, thank you to my parents, for always believing God would bring me to them. Thank you to my parents-in-law for your son, who was a surprise blessing. Thank you to all of my grandparents for giving life to my parents. And most of all, thank you to God, who is the giver of life and who has given me another birthday.